Current mood: breezy
Kill me romantically
Fill my soul with vomit
Then ask me for a piece of gum
Bitter and dumb, you're my sugar plum
~ "Love Me Dead" by Ludo
I am back in Nebraska and it is cold and rainy and did I mention cold???? Bloody Hell, two days ago, I was enjoying Coronado Beach, basking in the sunshine, and allowing the cold pacific water to kiss my feet. Now – I am bundled up in my BOSTON hoodie and praying for an end to the madness. (slight exaggeration – but just slightly)
Saturday afternoon was interesting – as I lost 2 hours somewhere over New Mexico – resulting in me being two hours earlier than the rest of my Nebraskan counterparts (with the exception of those in the far west panhandle – I am only an hour behind them). I would like to thank American Airlines for this loss of time. They delivered me from San Diego without a scratch – which I do appreciate, as crashing in my plane would have really put a damper on my non-vacation.
Speaking of the plane – that was an experience like no flight I have ever had. I was assigned seat 20A – which is a cozy window seat, over the wing, a perfect place for curling up with my iPod and my blankie, and going to sleep. Once I was seated, with seat belt fastened, I was pleasantly surprised by the cutest seatmate I could have imagined. He must have been 3, maybe 4 years old – friendly and very excited to be on the plane. His mama was busy holding onto his not as friendly little brother who apparently had the impression that his screams would be appreciated by the other passengers. I helped the kid get his seat belt on, etc, while his mom dealt with a crying baby. The boy and I were bonding, laughing about airplanes and silliness when a man spoke to me from the aisle. 'Excuse me, I am assigned to the aisle seat the next row up; but I'd like to sit with my family – would you be willing to switch places?"
What???? Here I am bonding with the kid – getting ready to take a comfy nap for the 3 hour flight, and you want to sit with your family? PLUS – how can I refuse? Who would actually say, "Um, no, I want to stay here so you have to sit by the meth-head girl in your row. Bloody hell! So, I move to the aisle – where I already know I will not be able to sleep. I keep sneaking looks back at the lil' guy who is playing peek a boo with me – cause he knows sitting with me was the shit – and sitting with dad is lame-o!
I take my NEW seat, and apparently put up a sign that said, "Hi, I am the in-flight entertainment" because "Friendly Guy" across the aisle starts chatting. He reminded me of one of my brothers, and we had already experienced a slight bonding moment upon boarding – so I do not discourage the conversation. However, I am in competition for his attention with "Slightly Annoyed Blonde Lady" sitting in the window seat of his row. All I am thinking is, 'hey Blondie, if you aren't going to sleep, why don't you take my spot, I'll take yours, and you can have "Friendly Guy" to your self, while I can nap.
I did not make this offer though – because it seemed rather stalkerish – though my motives would have been purely selfish ones which would enable me to have nap time.
Anyone who knows me knows that I do not enjoy flying – I do not enjoy staying awake on planes – and I do not enjoy being extroverted. Yet, there I was, awake, on a plane, enjoying myself, while conversing with a tech-savvy 23-year old who was looking forward to getting home to his girlfriend – a nice girl by the way, met her while waiting for our luggage. Shout out to 'Katie'. Sorry, I am getting way ahead of myself. . .
"FG" and I are chatting and he comments how tempting the snacks for sale are – but that they are not worth the crazy prices. When 60 year old flight attendant comes over and offers snacks, he said, "Tempting, but I had better not". She gave him a cold stare and said, "Okay, Mr. Smart Aleck". His face looked crestfallen (as I think he may have some kind of a 'grandmother complex') I spoke up in his defense, laughing – "No, really, he was just commenting how he was truly tempted by the food, but decided that he should wait to eat until he gets home.". Her face relaxed and she laughed. All was good again and no one was getting tossed off the plane. His obsession of the 60-year old flight attendant did border on "Harold and Maude" but I figure what goes on behind closed doors or under airplane blankets is really none of my concern – unless that airplane blanket is mine.
Over the course of a few hours, we learned all kinds of random facts – about movies; hairstyles; bare feet (not to be confused with 'bear feet' – which is a different fetish altogether); and even that Cindy – the head flight attendant – means business when she tells you to put your laptop away, sir! I was positive there would be a brawl between the guy in seat 16C and Cindy! Unfortunately, he got scared and actually put it away.
When we landed, I think the pilot forgot to hold onto the steering wheel, as the plane did a little shimmy upon contact with the runway – resulting in an echo of "whoa. . ." from the passengers. Not me, though. Apparently, I am no longer afraid of flying, because it didn't even faze me. Yea Me!
On the way to baggage claim, "Friendly Guy" almost killed me in the revolving door – but my quick thinking saved me from being squashed. Of course – our luggage came out last, which is why I was able to meet Katie (the girlfriend) and be the all-time point winner – because I do not have Cingular – nor do I cry at Kleenex commercials (unlike 'FG' who really is quite sentimental I think).
All kinds of hijinks and shenanigans occurred once I left the airport – but those will need to wait for another post!
PERSONAL NOTE: Say hi to the aloe vera plants for me!
CONFINDENTIAL NOTE: Thinking of you.
